From the moment she had heard of the existence of the place, Shaya had been dying to go to the library.
Ever since she was a child, books had been her one way of escaping the reality around her and she had never lost her facination for more knowledge and the tales of the world out there.
It had still taken her a couple of days before she was finally able to free herself from her chores. She had cleaned the kitchen that morning at lightning speed, just so she would have an hour before classes.
The first dissappointment she had ran into was the libriarian, who haughtily told her that novices were not allowed to take out any books.
That meant she would have to spend all her free time in here, when she had been planning to read before going to sleep.

She could see there was no point in argueing with the woman, in fact she looked like she was hoping Shaya would talk back at her, just so she could unleash whatever evil she had in mind. So Shaya only smiled and seemingly accepted her words. Stealing a book from the library would be easy compared to the things she had done before and so there was no point in wasting her breath on the sour old spinster who looked like she had never ever had any fun in her life. Shaya suddenly had a vivid mental image of the librarian kissing a man and she shuddered at the thought. She quickly forgot all about the woman as she walked through the rows and rows of books. She touched some of the spines almost with reverence and pretty soon her senses were overloaded with the wealth of information that lay within her grasp here.
She finally settled on a book about the basics ofchanneling, she wanted to get some more information on this ability she was supposed to have.
Looking round she picked a corner that was nicely out of the way where she would hopefully not be disturbed or send on some meaningless errant for another Aes Sedai who simple could not watch a novice be idle or have some time to herself.

After morning practice Valarian had been working on his paperwork in his office when he decided to bring a few books back to the library. He had either finished reading them or simply had no futher need for them anymore, and he liked to keep his desk as empty as possible. Keeping order in his paperwork was allways a lot easier when the things he was done with were out of the way. He took the pile of five books and headed for the library. He could have sent a soldier instead, but there weren't any around in the corridor and calling for one would be just as much a bother as just taking the books to the library himself. Besides he thought he would need a few new books as well. He exchanged a nod with an Aes Sedai at the entrance and put his books down on the counter.

Walking between the shelves in search of a few particular titles he summed up in his head which ones he should look for. Then suddenly he felt as if an icecold hand reached into his chest and tore out his heart. He completely froze at the sight of the young woman who was reading in a quite corner of the library. Her long wavy black hair and the way she sat there, caught up in reading instantly reminded him of Punar. Inhaling hurt, but he got himself together, only an instant before she looked up at him. It wasn't her. The girl didn't even look like an Ebu Dari and was a novice, obviously. Off course it wasn't her. His eyes that must have shown surprise now became empty again. The novice's features vaguely reminded him of her. He looked away. It hurt too much inside, to look at that face. Without saying a word he focused his attention on a bookshelf a little further, and headed that way.

As she sat reading, she suddenly became aware of someone watching her. As she was very much into the book she was reading, she looked up half-distracted, only to find a tall, muscular man gazing at her intently.
Shaya was momentarily taken aback, for it wasn't the mere look of a man admiring a woman, nor was it the appraising look of the asha'men she had come to know since arriving in the Tower. She started to smile tentatively, but the man had already turned and was heading towards a set of nearby shelves.
Shaya was intrigued nonetheless. There had to be a reason for a look like that and with a momentary pang of panic she wondered if he recognised her from one of her previous "assignments". She pushed the thought away as she thought she would not have forgotten a face, or a pair of gorgeous hazel colored eyes like that.
The uniform he wore marked him an Asha'man, so Shaya realised she could not just get up and start talking to him.

She was likely to find herself send off to the kitchens for some chores if they thought she was wasting her time with idle chat.
The Asha'man had obviously already dismissed her, so the wisest thing would be to leave it at that and make herself scarce while she had a chance. But Shaya was not that kind of woman that left thing well alone when she should.
Besides... it could never hurt to have some connections in higher places, right. She suppressed a quick grin at the thought and smoothly slipped out from behind the table. Picking up her book she pretended to be completely absorbed in reading it as she walked on slowly. She walked up to the shelve he was heading for, still seemingly completely engrossed in the lines before her and let herself bump into him.
Widening her eyes in feigned shock as she looked up from the book she made hherself drop the book as clumbsily as she could and then proceeded to drop a low curtsie. "I do apologise Asha'man, I didn't see you there. I should really look where I'm going." She looked up at him and risked a hesitant smile, holding on to that look of shock that a novice would have at running into an Asha''man like that. Inside her heart was racing with exitement. These subtle games were the kind of things she exelled at, this was where she was in her element.

Valarian had already dismissed the thought of Punar and the novice. He focused on his work and browsed through the titles on the bookshelf when a noise interrupted his concentration. Before he looked up the girl that he had seen before bumped into him and dropped the book she had been reading. As she picked up the book Valarian looked at her with a slight hint of surprise. Not for a split second did he believe she had really run into him by accident. He just couldn't figure out why she had done it. "I do apologise Asha'man, I didn't see you there. I should really look where I'm going." she said with a scared voice and looked up to smile shyly. "You should." He said coldly. He wasn't going to show his weak side to a novice, even if she resembled the woman he had once loved. It was silent then. He had nothing else to say to her. He kept blocking away the emotions that were whirling up inside him. He knew he should say something to discourage her from seeking contact with him again, but he didn't know what he should say. Her fake look of innocense allmost made him want to smile. When she had bended down to pick up her book a small lock of her hair had fallen into her face, but it didn't seem to bother her. While she kept looking at him like that, a second, maybe two, but it seemed an eternity to Valarian, he wanted to reach out his hand and gently remove the lock from her face. Dismiss her. His throat felt dry, his face was still blank but he swallowed audibly, He dismissed her with a wave of his hand. "Watch where you're going next time." He warned her. "Some asha'man aren't as forgiving as I am."

When he coldly told her that she should watch where she was going, Shaya thought she must have been mistaken about what she had seen in his eyes before. She blinked in confusion, for it was very unlike her to be mistaken about people. In her profession you usually ended up dead if you made mistakes like that. The smile faded from her face and she made another earnest curtsy now, ready to gather her skirts and get out of there before he could change his mind. But then there it was again. The distinct feeling that he wanted to do or say more and simply wouldn't allow himself to do so. Was there a slight faltering in the brusqueness of his voice? Perhaps the merest of shoulder movements towards her that indicated he was more open to her than he let on? Shaya had made a life's work out of reading people's faces and body languages but since she had come to the Tower, everything had changed. Aes Sedai and Asha'man could easily outdo any professional gambler when it came to keeping a straight face. It was vexing to say the least, especially at times like this when she thought she would burst with curiosity. She felt like a kitten that was pawing at a rattlesnake: too curious to let it go and probably about to get seriously hurt for it. As frustrating as it was, she would have to drop it for now.

Her charm obviously failed and if she angered him any further there would be no chance of finding out what lay beyond that mysterious pair of dark eyes. Shaya thought her facination with secrets and intrigue could very well be the death of her one day.
"As you say, Asha'man. I assure you it will not happen again. I've not been in the Tower long and I guess I am still getting used to the discipline." There was no pretence now anymore, she said the words in earnest and stayed lowered in her curtsie while she said it, eyes castdown on the floor. She did not really expect him to reply, most likely he would just turn and walk away without giving her a second glance.

"As you say, Asha'man. I assure you it will not happen again. I've not been in the Tower long and I guess I am still getting used to the discipline." The novice said and Valarian nodded inwardly. He wanted to get away from her. She confused him and he didn't like it one bit. Valarian was never confused. He wouldn't allow himself to get carried away by a novice that reminded him of memories long passed, and tears long since dried. He wouldn't have it. Without speaking he turned around. She knew he had dismissed her and he just walked out of the library.

He felt like his heart was beating for the first time since decades. He had acted silly and he wanted to kick himself for it. He couldn't understand how seeing that girl had screwed him up in a few seconds. He needed to redeem himself. He would go to the practice yard after.... In the middle of the road he suddenly stopped. He had walked out of the library without books, even though he had been searching in the library before the novice had bumped into him. So even if he had been able to keep an emotionless face, she would have noticed he had suddenly marched out of the library without taking what he had come for. He sighed. This is bothersome. He was certain he would see her again. And she would know she did something to him. It was a disturbing thought.

A soldier that passed him by greeted him. The look on the young man's face was awkward. As if he was surprised or confused... Valarian blinked. Off course. The soldier had probably seen him sigh and show all kinds of emotions. Unlikely to see with any asha'man, leave alone Valarian al Dera who was born with a pokerface, according to some students. He knew what people said about him, and it didn't bother him. He concluded that the rumor of Valarian showing emotion would spread like running fire. He hurried back to his study. The rumor would probably be dismissed soon by lack of credibility if no one else had seen him. Inside his study he closed the door behind him and leaned against it.

Who was that girl? How come she made him so painfully aware he was alive? He rested the back of his head against the door. Why am I acting so dramatic about this? It's ridiculous. He felt his heart racing like it would break his chest. Thoughts of Punar hurt him. She is not Punar. Doesn't even look like her. I have to get myself together. Go train. Think about duty. Have the M'hael send me on a long and dangerous mission, anywhere.

As she had suspected, Shaya found herself alone when she dared look up next.
The Asha'man had dissappeared as quickly and silentlly as he had arrived.
Shaya began to make her way back to the table she had been sitting at earlier, still deep in thought about the curious encounter.

Just then it hit her that he had left without taking any books, even though that had obviously been his purpose for coming here.
She wondered what could make him give up his intention and rush out like that, but then who knew what went on inside the mind of a man who could channel. It kept niggling at her from the back of her mind, and she found herself look up from her book and stare into space on numerous occassions after he'd left.