Name: Hanajima al'Cere
Age: 16
Nationality: Caemlyn
Height:5'6
Weight: 110
Hair color/length: medium straight brown
Eye color: Brown with a tint of gold
A quick overview of personality: Hana is really nice and gentle. If someone get's on her nerve's though she can get angry. Hana can also pull of any emotion she wants, when ever she wants.
Channelers (Aes Sedai or Asha'man Paths):Aes Sedai
One Power scores
Current strength:
Base strength:20
Age when started to channel:16
Current Age:16
Flow Affinity
Water:8
Air:7
Earth:6
Fire:5
Spirit:7
Talents:
Major~Folding the light
Minor~Seeing Ta'veren,Elementalism
History:
Born and raised in Caemlyn Hana was always around people and knew about the many dangeours(sp?). Hana was always fooling around with her friends Dela Tohru and Arisa. When ever Hana was around her friends she was always hyper and still is.Almost everyday Hana, Arisa, Tohru, and Dela would dream about becoming an Aes Sedai. They play all sorts of games in relation to that. They all wanted to go together. Hana had always loved water. She was always doing something with water. Hana lived with her parents and little brother Sota.Hana was close to her parents and always listened to them. They had gained respect thought eachother.Hana and Sota were very close so whenever Sota was sad Hana would know and would do her best to cheer him up. Sota would also try to cheer Hana up when she was sad too, and it usually worked. Hana was very happy that she had her brother.
Every day Hana had to work harder around her home, and had less time to hang with her friends. One day Hana got tired and complianed(sp?) to her mom, but that only earned her more chores and and a punishment.But later that night Hana's mother explained that She needed more help around the house and thoguht it would be a learning experience for Hana. Hana understood that and never complained, she tried to do what ever she could to help her family. Most of Hana's family lived in Caemlyn, so every once and a while she would have to make visits to see them and help her grandparents, seeing as they were sick. One day, when Hana was 10 her mother and father decided to go to Aringill. Hana not wanting to leave her friends and other family, stayed behind and lived with her aunt. Hana's brother Sota had also not wanted to leave so he also stayed but he lived with one of his friends. Hana was very glad that her brother had stayed in Caemlyn, she would have been lost if he had left. Everyday Hana made sure that she had visited Sota. But eventually the visits had died down until she had stoped going. This of course wasn't her fault, her aunt had always been on her back about leaving the house. Her Aunt had eventually banned Hana from leaving the house, and had banned her friends and brother from coming in the house. So Hana had a very miserable life. Each day Hana was waiting for her parents to send a letter, or come back home, she would also have dreams about it. Hana got in trouble all most everyday. Alot of the times she was daydreaming, thinking about her life before her parents and Sota. Hana had reallly missed Sota and was always thinking about him. She wondered amny things, like how he was,and what was he doing. She really hoped that he had a better life then she had.
Six years had gone past, Hana was thinking of running away, but she always knew that her aunt would find her if she stayed in Caemlyn, and she must stay in Caemlyn she just couldn't stand the thought of leaving her brother. One ordinary day, or so it seemed, Hana heard someone knock at the door. Knowing that her Aunt had left to go shopping for food and such, Hana went to answer the door. As she opened the door Hana saw a women dressed in black clothes, that looked very dirty.
" Hana is the you?" the Lady asked
" umm yes...." you said wondering who that could be.
" Hana this is Awen." She said.
" Awen!!" Hana yelled in surprise.
" shhhhh keep your voice down Hana. I can't stay long and you can risk your aunt hearing you." Awen said.
" ok sorry, I'm just so excited to finally see a face i know." Hana replied, with her face filled with excitment.
" Why?? What has she done to you?" Awen demanded.
So quickly Hana explained what her Aunt Catherine had done to her, trying to not miss any detail, she knew Awen whould get it out of her eventually.She told Awen all about how she hated everything about her Aunt and would escape but the one time she tried, her Aunt beat her. Hana had also tried to get her aunt to treat her better, but only got extra chores and a speech on respect, it was these times that Hana missed her parents most..Awen sat and looked as if she would kill. Awen had been a friend of Hana's parents and she had known Hana since she was born.
" ... and she hasn't let me leave the house since then." Hana finished, wiping her eye's.
" I know I should have let you stay here." Awen said hugging Hana, trying to comfort her. " but I must tell you something. "
" What? what is it Awen??" Hana asked.
So as quickly as possible Awen started to tell Hana about what had happened to her parents in Aringill. Awen told Hana that they had died of a diease that had spread though out the area they were in. Awen had just escaped it and was lucky to be alive. Wehn Awen told Hana that her parents had died Hana burst out in tears, she tried to stop but couldn't, Hana had always wanted them to come back and her parents Sota and herself could all live like they did before. Before all this happened. She also told Hana about her parents plans to send her to Tar Valon. They had always thought that she could eventually become an Aes Sedai. But since Hana's parents had died with out telling her this, Awen thought it was her duty to find and tell Hana this. Finishing Awen sat up and hugged Hana one last time and headed to the door.
" Ohh and Hana..." She said.
" Yes Awen." Hana said turning to look at Awen.
" Please don't worry about your brother I know he is safe where he is, and if ever he is in danger, I will protect him." With that Awen headed out the door, but just before she closed the door Hana asked how she got here. Awen had explained everthing thing that she could saying that she ,moved with Hana's parents and just before Hana's parents were going to leave to come back to Caemlyn, they got very sick, from the diease, and couldn't move from their bed, but a week later they had died. Awen also asked Hana why she had never responded to any letter they had sent her. Hana was very surprised at this and told Awen that she had never recived a letter and never got any word from anyone she knew. Awen looked really angry, but instead of doing anything she got up with a last farwell to Hana, and left.
As soon as Awen had left Hana edmently(sp?) thought of her brother, If she went to Tar Valon she wouldn't see him again for many years. But her thought switched when she remembered the rest of what Awen had said and if he is ever in danger I will protect him. Satisifed that Awen would protect her little brother, Hana ran to her room and started to pack, hurrying so that she could live before herr Aunt arrived back home.
Just as Hana had finisshed packing she heard the door open and slam shut. shoot, she back. She'll never let me leave Caemlyn. I wish I had finished earlier. Was all Hana thought.
" Hana! Hana!" Hana heard an unfamiler voice call, she had heard it before but not in a long time. Walking out of her room Hana saw her old friends Arisa, Dela, and Tohru. Almost Instantly Hana ran over and gave each of them a big hug.
" I've missed you guys soo much!" Hana said with tear's forming at her eye's.
" Ya I know. We've missed you too" Dela said, speaking for the three of them.
" I'm sorry to kick you out but I have to go to Tar Valon. I need to go there, for my mom and dad." Hana found it strange saying those words again.
" Well here let us give you hand. Are you done packing??" Tohru asked.
" Ya I'm done I just need to get going." Hana replied.
" OK well, we'll walk you to the city gates." Arisa said.
" ok, but we need to make a stop at my brother's house." Hana said, leaving to get her stuff.
Slowly the girls made their way towards Sota's new home. As soon as the housewas in view Hana started to run, she wassoo excited just to see her family again. She couldn't wait to see Sota again. Knocking on the door. Mirassia, Sota's friends mother, answered the door.
"Is Sota there?" Hana asked.
" Yes but may I ask who you are?" She replied.
" I'm his sister."Hana replied.
Sota was listening from the other room and as soon as he heard those words come out of Hana's mouth, he ran towards he. Hana seeing Sota running at her knelt down to hug him.
" I've missed soooo much." Hana said still hugging Sota.
" Why did you stop visiting Hana?" Sota asked.
" Aunt Catherine banned me from going outside or seeing any of my friends or family." Hana responed, saying it so low that only Sota could hear.
" oh.. Well at least your back now." Sota said, not really getting what Hana said
" Well Sota that's why I'm hear. I'm leaving for Tar Valon today." Hana said.
" NO! You can't go! I won't let you!." Sota yelled grabing Hana's legs, so she couldn't move.
" Sota I must. " Hana said unwraping his arms." it's all for the best, and you have a gaurdian angel. Trust me."
" Why? Why do you have to leave?" Sota said starting to cry.
" Because I have to, it was mom and dad's wish that I headed there." Hana said not faultering at the mention of her parents.
" Mom? Dad? where are they?" Sota asked.
" Sota their... thier... dead." Hana said.
Bursting out in tears Sota ran back into the house.
" Mirassia, will you please make sure he is alright. I would go myself, but I don't have the time to spear." Hana said, regretting that she had so little time.
" yes.. yes. You go now and make your parents proud." Mirassia said smiling at Hana.
Turning around Hana headed to where her friends were standing. Putting their arms around her shoulders comforting, Arisa, Dela, and Tohru all felt sorry for Hana having to leave her brother in his time of need. Slowly they headed towards the city gates and made it there just before night fall.
" Are you sure, you don't want to stay the night here?" Dela asked.
" No I can't, I don't have any time to waste. I must leave now." Hana said, giving her friends one last hug.
Waving back at her friends Hana walked away. As soon as her friends were out of her sight Hana started to run towards Tar Valon. To her it was like she had not a minute to waste. The trip to Tar Valon was long and lonely. Each night Hana had strange dreams of her brother, her parents, and Awen. She had no idea what they ment, it they ment anything at all. Each day of traveling Hana thought about if it wasthe right decision to go to Tar Valon. She had left her brother, her friends, and family. A few times Hana almost turned around but stoped herself, she knew she would see Sota again and she knew he was in good hands. Many times Hana thought about what it would have been like if she stayed for a little bit, but then she knew her Aunt Catherine would have found her and then she would have been in huge trouble. In the end Hana knew going to Tar Valon would be the best decision to make. After many many day's of traveling Hana finally reached Tar Valon. Where she is now a novice.
Not a bad base, I just have a few things.
Which of the admins approved your Talents? All three of them require permission before they can be used. Also, you need to give a very good reason to make Hana only 13 years old, it's almost unheard of that a girl would begin channeling that early. Hana would not always have had an ability to make water do whatever she want, since that would involve channeling from her childhood, most girls don't start until they're 16-20, younger than that is very rare.
Your story is good, it's unique, which is nice. However, you need to flesh it out and add detail. Don't let all the length come from dialogue, instead try summarizing those occurances, and making more length from things that actually happen in Hana's life. Here's some ideas, based on questions I had while reading your bio:
What about her parents? I was kinda left in the dark about that, you don't tell much about what Hana feels when they die. Also, what little she feels doesn't seem to go well with the fact that she was worked so hard at home. Go into more detail about how she feels about them, and how she feels when she finds out they died. Talk more about Sota, he's obviously very important to her, doesn't she wonder about him when she's basically a captive in her aunt's home? And talk about her aunt. Clearly, the woman had a huge influence in Hana's life, what did Hana think of her aunt, and what did she think about how she was kept?
You need to go into more detail about Hana's parents wanting Hana to go to the Tower as well. It's one thing for parents to dream that their daughter would become Aes Sedai or Gaidar, it's another to dream that as strongly as Hana's parents apparently did.
Hana has lots of separations and reunions with important people. Tell me how she feels when she sees her friends and brother again, and how she feels when she has to leave them all so suddenly. How did Awen manage to talk to her when for three years that was impossible? Why is it that this time Hana could run away when before she had never tried, or had tried failed?
ok I'll update it a.s.a.p
It should be updated. PLease tell me if I missed anything. I need to know, after all this is my first bio
That's much better! Definately better than my first bio. :P
Approved. :)
thanks I had some inspertaion, I may keep adding to it if that's alright
It's absolutely fine, add as much as you want. :)