Q ('cue') Me


Introduction

I'm finally back with a totally new story... :)

This story is mainly just for fun and perhaps maybe a little something to reflect on. It is a cross-over between Bad Girls (Nikki/Helen) with Star Trek Voyager (Janeway/Seven), but I hope it is still ok to post it on the Bad Girls board.

I have always been fascinated by the Star Trek universe, especially The Next Generation and Voyager, so when I was introduced to the idea of a possible relationship between Captain Kathryn Janeway and Seven of Nine from STV not that long ago, I took the opportunity to look a bit closer on the idea of them being romantically involved.

When already deeply fascinated by Bad Girls, especially the relationship between Nikki & Helen and having made some character analysis, I discovered several similarities and themes that could be recognized with a little effort in STV and the relationship between Kathryn Janeway and Seven of Nine too, though much more subtle and definitely not pursued in the show openly nor acknowledged as a possibility by the actors (too bad really…).

I am aware that some might not like the pairing of Kathryn Janeway and Seven of Nine, but I hope those of you who don't will be kind enough to forgive my indulgence in playing with the idea.

The timelines as well of some of the events of both Bad Girls and Star Trek Voyager are slightly altered to fit into this story. The author is aware of that fact and hopes that you will be able to look beyond it, just for this story.

Any possible resemblances to other stories are purely accidental.

Comments and critiques are most welcome.


Disclaimer

Bad Girls and all its characters are the property of Shed Productions. The characters of Star Trek Voyager and the good ship itself belong to Paramount. The author implies no ownership of all these characters. They are used in the story without permission solely for entertainment /fun and not for any kind of profit.

The story may contain some bad language and some 15-rated stuff between consenting persons / adults of the same sex, in other words a same gender relationship, so if you are in any way offended by that, then stop reading. Otherwise please feel free to read on and enjoy the story.



Prologue

Being an omnipotent entity certainly had its advantages, especially when observing the extremely irrational behaviour of those strange creatures called Humans. Though Humans were indeed an odd species they had always fascinated Q beyond reason and he paid them a visit every so often as his other little experiments left him with time to spare. Q had often allowed himself to indulge in that little weakness of his, something that the fellow members of the Q continuum did not comprehend. But Humans amused Q and oddly enough he felt a special connection to them.

However, the Humans did not always consider his visits as being very friendly or even desirable. In fact he had often been accused of having a perverse sense of humour regarding the innocent tests he had exposed them to. Those Humans could be so touchy about it; just because Q had put the Humanity on trial for its crimes. Q hated to admit it, but sometimes he still could not fully understand how Jean-Luc had been able to get Humanity off the hook for those crimes.

Besides they never seemed to appreciate his attempts to widen their narrow perception of life and the universe. Humans were so 3 dimensional in their thinking, but that was probably because of their limited brain capacity and thereby their inability to think multidimensional thoughts. And they had absolutely no understanding off his efforts in helping them overcome that ridiculous thing they called the human nature and compassion.

Q sighed deeply, well, as deeply as an omnipotent entity could sigh. The Human nature was very puzzling and though Q once had experienced the full consequences of being a mere and frail Human, he was no closer to understanding the complexity of the Human mind. Illogical as they were, they had made a habit out of crossing his plans and altering them to their wishes.

But no matter how confusing or irrational Humans behaved, they did have some rather interesting habits, such as denying their true feelings though they, at the same time, praised feelings and love as the ultimate goal in the Universe. How much of a contradiction was that? They strived to achieve the emotions of love, yet they were unwilling to acknowledge what was right in front of them. And it seemed to be a problem that had existed as long as the Human race.

On that basis Q had derived what he believed to be a very interesting experiment, which would involve his dear friend Captain Kathryn Janeway, who so graciously had assisted him on several occasions. The latest was teaching the young Q a lesson about Humanity. And now he wanted to pay her back in kind by helping her to be happy with her resident Borg drone, whom she obviously had very strong feelings for; at least when considering the fact that she had taken up the fight with the Borg Queen herself to get Seven of Nine back, when she was indirectly abducted.

However, it might prove more difficult than first anticipated. It had to be made obvious to her without any means of escape. She had a very annoying habit of being able to wriggle her way out of anything. But this time she would be trapped. Q just had to play the cards in the right way. He considered his options carefully, when his attention were drawn to another timeline.

In that specific timeline another pair of women seemed to be struggling with their feelings for each other. A pair of women matching his favourite Captain and her drone in more ways that he cared to think about, was placed conveniently in a position where he could use them to achieve the proof that Humans were indeed in denial of their own true feelings. The women at hand were living on the planet Earth a couple of hundred years before the Captain's time. And they seemed to be in a very strange situation, one of the women, Nikki Wade, being a prisoner and the other one, Helen Stewart, her jailer. The woman, Helen Stewart, seemed to be as stubborn and bound by regulations as the Starfleet Captain, and Nikki Wade seemed to be as rebellious and blunt as the Borg. That would definitely prove to be a most outstanding opportunity for proving his hypothesis.

Q had found the perfect solution to the logistics of his little experiment. He would simply make Kathryn Janeway and Helen Stewart switch places without their conscious knowledge. He would erase the memories of their own timelines, only providing them with the true histories of their past, but not with their own professions. That should do the trick. And trimming it with altering the memories of the surrounding individuals, so they would only remember what he allowed them to remember would top off his scheme. It would be essential for the plan to catch them in their sleep and transfer them to the destinations he had decided upon. They would wake up not having a clue to what was going on. That would add to his amusement, and his experiment would benefit from it too.

The time was up and Q got ready to initiate the plan. At the snap his fingers thing would be turned upside down for his favourite Captain and a certain wing governor from the 20th century.

Part 1 In the darkness - Chapter 1

In the darkness there is light, and in the light there is darkness. Thus begins the tale of the journey of lovers, who have lost their sense of direction and purpose. A tale that crosses hundreds of years in time and thousands of light years in distance. But the story of love is universal and applies to every living being, no matter where in the Galaxy they are and no matter in which timeline or dimension their life takes place.

HMP Larkhall Women's Prison, London

Nikki Wade had protected her girlfriend of 9 years Trish Harris. She had prevented her from being raped by a corrupt police officer named Gossard, who instead ended up dead. Nikki Wade was then convicted for murder and sentenced to prison for life. She had been in HMP Larkhall women's prison for a little more than 2.5 years. Most of the time she had served had been sheer hell. She had had to be strong and very tough to survive in the rough environment of the prison. Somehow it helped that she was convicted of murder. It gave her the respect from the other inmates and as long as she pretended to be the cold blooded killer people would leave her alone and keep a proper distance, which she preferred.

However, being a strong prisoner inevitably results in enemies and Nikki had a few led by Michelle "Shell" Dockley and her sidekick Denny Blood. But they were no real threat to her. At least they were nothing more than what she could easily handle. She had plenty of experience of handling bullies like them from the nightclub she owned and worked in before her imprisonment.

She preferred to keep to herself, but in spite of the odds she had made a few friends. Good women, though she would never have befriended them under normal circumstances, but inside a prison one had to make allies with as many as possible, even when one had a hard killer dyke image. Nikki had never hidden the fact that she was a lesbian, and quite a few of the women inside had their eyes set on her, since she was rather good looking being tall, lean and having dark brown eyes and jet-black hair. But she was not interested in a relationship with anyone, not even a fling or a physical release, since she had her girlfriend waiting outside. Or so she had thought for the first couple of years.

Her protective nature made her take some of the younger and weaker women under her wing. So she cared for them like an older sister or even a mother. That soon made her clasp heads with the guards, especially Jim Fenner a male chauvinist bastard who used every opportunity to siege his chance to taunt her and to make her do something stupid in order to get herself into trouble. Nikki was soon having a reputation of being a real troublemaker, and all too often she ended up in the block, whether she had deserved it or not, but she was a convenient scapegoat whenever there was trouble with the inmates.

To make everything just a little bit worse than it already was, the woman she had killed for, her girlfriend, Trish had cheated on her with another woman after just about 2 years of being apart. Though she had not really believed Trish to stay celibate for the rest of her life it had shocked her to her core. And though she had pretended it was ok and had even made it easier for Trish by saying she had found someone else herself, it had hurt her beyond reason. At the time Nikki had wondered why she had protected Trish even in that situation, but her friend Monica, an older woman, had told it was because of love.

Nikki was not averse to agreeing with Monica, though she had to admit to herself that the real spark between them had been gone for a while. Nikki had loved Trish dearly and still did even after she had cheated on her, but they had grown too comfortable with each other and they were no longer in love. Partly from being on the rebound of the break-up with Trish and partly because it was the first good thing that had happened to her in all her time in prison Nikki had developed very strong feelings for the new wing governor, who had showed her honest respect as a person and a genuine good will to change the conditions for the women in the prison. The new wing governor had at first confused Nikki profoundly by her actions, but gradually Nikki realized that it was not empty words and hollow promises, but true and heartfelt attempts to change things for the better. The woman was an idealist and quite a visionary, a one woman army that could make a difference, the new wing Governor.


* * * * *

This particular morning Nikki woke up feeling strangely disturbed and out of sorts. She could hear the familiar noises from the prison waking up in sleepy disgruntlement. She heard the rough noises from the guards waking the inmates. Nikki felt the light throb in her temples announcing a forthcoming headache. Her eyes slowly opened and with difficulty she tried to sit up on her bunk. Nausea swept over her and she had to shut her eyes tight in order to regain her composure. She groaned out loudly disturbing the other occupant of the cell.

"Are you all right?" Monica asked with a voice coloured by deep concern for her younger friend. Monica was Nikki's cellmate and they had developed a mutual respect and deep friendship, since she had been there for Nikki and listened to her when she was left by Trish.

"I don't know… I think so… Maybe not…" Nikki could not recognize her own voice as she spoke. "I have this feeling that something is very wrong."

"What do you mean?" Monica sounded puzzled, and even to Nikki herself her previous words seemed strangely odd, yet she knew deep inside that things were not what they seemed to be. She just could not put her finger exactly on what was wrong.

"I don't know… I just have this … this feeling that something is not what is appears to be," Nikki hesitated while trying to gather her thoughts that were in a muddle. Nothing made sense to her. She had been dreaming of a dark blond woman with green-grey sparkling eyes, a full bodied laughter and a captivating Scottish lilt that could melt her heart.

"Are you having trouble with Kathryn again?" Monica's voice cut through Nikki's dazed mind and pulled her back to the present.

"Kathryn?" Nikki sounded a bit puzzled and for a brief moment she was thrown off track, but she soon realized who Monica spoke about. The wing governor who occupied most of Nikki's waking moments as well as her dreams at night. Except for this night, where another woman had entered her dreams and made her restless. She sighed heavily and dropped her head to her hands in order to collect her thoughts. She finally ran a hand trough the short black hair that looked even more ruffled after that treatment than usual.

"I… I don't know… I have this indefinable feeling that something has changed… That I'm not where I'm supposed to be… Not that way… I mean… I know I'm in prison and why… but I… think… "

Nikki was interrupted by the cell door abruptly swinging open with a loud thump when it hit the wall revealing one of her least favourite guards, Jim Fenner.

"Rise and shine, Wade, your favourite wing governor will arrive soon," Jim Fenner smirked at Nikki and the intonation in his voice left little doubt as to what he was referring. The implicating tone made Nikki furious, and she wanted nothing more than to just throttle the man. Her feelings were obvious when she threw back her answer.

"Piss off, Fenner!"

"Tsk, tsk, that's not a way to address an employee of HM prisons." He just grinned with an even bigger smirk on his face. He knew exactly what buttons to push in order to make Nikki react in the most unfavourable way. Nikki knew that, but was totally unable to restrain herself from reacting on him pinpricking her. She had leapt to her feet and was standing in front of Jim Fenner starring him squarely in the eyes, challenging his actions.

"Just…." she started, but was abruptly cut off by Jim Fenner.

"Just what? Or maybe you want to go down the block again?" He lifted an eyebrow questionable with a sardonic expression in his pale eyes.

"Mr. Fenner, can I have a word with the wing governor?" Monica interrupted the exchange of words between the prison guard and Nikki.

"I will see if she has time…"

With a sigh of relief Nikki slumped back on her bunk in a heap.

"Come on, Nikki, we better get some breakfast, while there is still something… even if it is only just eatable."

Nikki dragged herself to a standing position, swayed a bit before steadying herself as the dizziness slowly left her brain. She grabbed her tray and reluctantly followed Monica to the main dining area. This day could not possible start off any worse.

Next update.... please enjoy... :)

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Part 1 In the darkness - Chapter 2

The emptiness of space provides little, if any warmth to a lonely heart. Thus wandering on a path towards the source of light only the whispers of the darkness can guide the loner, but only if the help is truly appreciated and accepted without hesitation and without second thought. The question is whether the beacon is strong enough and recognizable or if perhaps stronger means have to be applied.


The captain’s quarters, bridge and ready room, USS Voyager, the Delta Quadrant


Helen Stewart, Captain of the Federation Starship USS Voyager lost in the Delta Quadrant more than 70.000 light years away from home. What else could possibly go wrong?

Helen Stewart had been on a fast track program in Starfleet and advanced fast through the ranks. She was very young when she got her first command on the USS Billings, where she also met Tuvok, who became her friend. At first they had not exactly seen eye to eye, but over the years had become close friends; that is as close as one could get with a Vulcan. The total lack of displayed emotions from Tuvok was a good complementary quality to her own passionate, and at times even irrational response to things. Though experience had taught her to hide her emotions, but not always her temperament, she was a compassionate and caring woman ready to sacrifice her life for her ship and her crew.

Her mother had died when Helen was only a child, and she was raised by her father, a traditionalist who sympathised with the religious fragments on Earth. He had even been a minister at some point. He was a severe and hard man, who brought his daughter up under strict regulations. As a reaction to his almost obsessive need for control Helen had chosen to join Starfleet Academy as soon as she was old enough. She had always been top in her class in school and was more than qualified to apply. She had moved to San Francisco to study at the Academy, much to her father’s disgruntlement.

Over the years she had only had the briefest of contact with her father. Something she did regret at times since he was her only close family. But as long as he was unable to fully accept her choice of career, there was very little she could do about it. The fact that she was assigned to missions that often took her away from Earth for months or even years posed another obstacle for any attempt to repair their relationship, and being in the Delta Quadrant was definitely not beneficial ether. He probably considered her dead by now.

Helen sighed heavily and stretched out on the big bed, which seemed far too big and far too lonely for the petit woman. She was small-framed, but seemed strong and confident. Her uniform made her look powerful and in control. Her dark blonde hair was normally tucked behind her ears and her green grey eyes could sparkle either with amusement or anger. Lately another expression had entered her eyes; a haunted expression laden with a touch of profound sadness.

Helen groaned when she saw her own reflection in the mirror above the sink. Her hair was disarrayed, her eyes were red-rimmed and bloodshot. She had been a little too absorbed in the Vodka bottle last night. And it had not been that synthetic stuff from the replicators, but the real thing. She had been able to sneak a couple of bottles onboard before their departure from Deep Space 9. It was one of her few vices and not something she indulged in on a regular basis, but sometimes it was something she craved in order to maintain her sanity.

And her sanity had thoroughly been tested as well as her leadership. She did not mind a challenge, nor did she mind her crew having a sceptical attitude to life. She could understand and even appreciate wanting to have reasons for doing what was necessary, but this was absolutely ridiculous. It had turned into a battle of wills, and she would be damned if she was going to give in.

Her opponent was no other than a former Borg drone, but not just any drone. It was the drone that had acted as a kind of emissary during the fragile collaboration with the Borg that had resulted in the defeat of species 8472. When the Borg had tried to bail out of their part of the deal and the drone left on Voyager had tried to take over the ship, she had severed the drone’s link to the Collective. She had discovered that the Borg drone was in fact the human female Annika Hansen, who had been assimilated at the age of 6.

Helen had wanted to return her to her human form, but it had proved a lot more difficult than she had expected. Seven of Nine had been nothing but obstructive and contraire, but underneath all that cold Borg appearance Helen had seen a young, insecure woman struggling to find her place among the crew of Voyager. Not many had tried to even look past the aloof, and at times, rather arrogant attitude she normally displayed, whether she was working or interacting with others in a social occasions. Most also deemed her humourless and were, in fact, quite terrified of her.

However, Helen had seen the real person beneath the facade, and she had worked hard to crack the shell and mentor her back to humanity. Lately her maternal instincts for the younger woman had altered into something far less than maternal. In fact she had started to feel attracted to the young woman, a fact that had been highly confusing. She was not into women, not in that way. All her previous lovers had been men and she had never considered a relationship with a woman. And she was certainly not going to begin now, not ever and not with this young and well... innocent, and possibly even inexperienced woman.

Not only had the latent feelings started to grate on her nerves, but some rather disturbing dreams had invaded her nights of slumber. Faces, voices, smells, noises and pictures like very distant memories, so real that she could almost reach out and touch the images that confused her and made her doubt her sanity. Especially one reoccurring image had troubled her more than anything else. The face of a beautiful, dark haired woman with deep brown sad eyes starring intensely at her through what looked like metal bars in a prison. She was begging her to stay with a pleading look in those dark eyes. Only in her dream Helen turned on her heal and left feeling both distraught and convinced that it was the only right thing to do. But it had broken her heart to see the disappointment on the other woman’s face.

The dream had become more and more real leaving Helen in deepest despair. Night after night she had woken bathed in cold sweat and shivering with dread. But she was totally unable to focus on her dreams when awake. Only the unsettling lingering sense of something being truly wrong was leaving her with the feeling of being out of place. She was scared of the unknown, something she would never have thought could occur to her being a scientist and explorer.

Though Helen Stewart was not a morning person she rarely ran late due to her sense of duty, but this morning had been different than any other morning in her life. The dreams had haunted her and made her sleep restless, resulting in her being more than half an hour late for her duty shift. Something that did not please her, but there was very little she could do about it. On the top of it she felt herself being in the wrong place, even if it was the only place she could be considering their circumstances.

Helen made her way onto the bridge balancing a cup of coffee in one hand and a stack of pads in the other. If anyone thought it to be odd they refrained from saying anything to her. Even her first officer, a broad dark man kept his mouth shut, though an amused glint was surely found in his eyes.

“Report” she barked deliberately ignoring his look.

“All quiet and peaceful, captain” he said while standing to attention.

“I’ll be in my offi… ready room…” Helen said and hurried to her sanctuary still juggling with coffee and pads. She managed to spill some of the hot coffee on her hand in her haste. She cursed silently. What more could possibly go wrong? That was something she really did not want to think about. She tapped on her computer console retrieving the reports and messages she had to review, but before she had even opened her first load of work she was disturbed by the chime from her door.

“Enter!”

The door opened and revealed the first problem of her day, a fuming half-klingon chief engineer.

“Lt. Torres?” the captain asked with a questioning look.

“Captain, you got to keep that Borg away from my engines and tell it stop rerouting the power without my permission!” B’Elanna Torres was the personification of indented rage.

Helen sighed silently and started to rub her temples where building throbs announced a fast approaching headache. With a weary voice she finally asked:

“What has Seven done now?”

“She has taken all the powers from the relays reserved for the extra repairs and rerouted it to Astrometrics. And she has tampered with the impulse engines again….” Torres was struggling to keep her anger at bay in front of the captain.

“Is anything broken?” Helen asked in an even voice.

“No, Captain…” B’Elanna Torres was shaking with pent-up ire. That bloody Borg pet of the captain was seriously grating her nerves, but she knew it was not doing her any good to point that out to the captain..

“Do the engines not work?”

“No, but Captain that is not the point…” The Chief Engineer was about to elaborate on her accusations, but was cut off by a very curt Captain.

“Lt. Torres… That would be all… I will take care of Seven of Nine… now please return to your duties… Dismissed!” the Captain barked with a very sharp edge to her otherwise soft Scottish lilt.

B’Elanna Torres was about to speak, but stopped abruptly at the look on the Captains face and the warning glint in her eyes, flashing dangerously grey-green sparks of impending anger ready to erupt.

“Yes, Captain…”

The Chief Engineer spun on her heel and stormed out of the Ready room. The door hissed as it closed behind the lieutenant. Helen leaned over the desk and dropped her aching head in her hands. This was going to be the day from Hell.

Sorry for the delay in updates... but here it is... please enjoy... :)


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Part 1 In the darkness - Chapter 3

There is nothing more important in the world of imprisonment than light at the end of the tunnel. The few rays of hope that must be kept in focus are everything and nothing. The little things that capture the essence of hope are important in order for the imprisoned not to sink deeply into despair. At the same time it means nothing to those who have freedom and are in no need of hope or light.


On the road to HMP Larkhall Women’s Prison, London

Kathryn Janeway was a feisty, auburn haired woman just around 40-years of age. She was small framed, but radiating a strength and determination that even physically bigger persons lacked. She had an aura of authority around her, and not many dared to oppose her directly. However, lately some or someone from her staff was trying to undermine her leadership, and that infuriated her beyond reason.

Her jaw was firm and gave her face character and a serious expression. Her eyes were a mix between dark blue and grey. They were truly the mirror to her soul. When no expressions could be found on her face, one could just look carefully into her eyes to see her true feelings. She was a very compassionate woman with the capacity to transfer that into action. Her movements were filled with energy and she never seemed to be lingering in one place for too long. She was always on the move and had an obvious dislike for confinement of any kind. So it was a bit ironic that she worked in a prison.

Kathryn Janeway had her opinions and was not afraid to let other people know them. She was also a rather unorthodox leader and had introduced some rather radical changes to her new work. It was not looked upon with gratitude or even welcomed in the slightest. In fact, most of her proposals had been refused downright with a rude attitude from the prison’s Governing Governor Simon Stubberfield. She had some clashes with the bigoted man, but she was a stubborn woman and determined to get her way. She was not used to being questioned about her actions and intentions. As a matter of fact, she had been demoted when moving to her work competence to Larkhall.

She had been governing governor at Mount Joy prison in Dublin, but her results there had immediately been noticed by Area Management, who requested she transfer her ideas and polities to Larkhall. And in dire need of a change she had accepted the challenge, even although it meant a demotion.

Amongst all the adversity there had been a few bright spots. Some things were going the right way and not all of her staff were as difficult as her second in command Jim Fenner and his side kick Sylvia Hollamby. They were part of the original staff and had not been pleased to accept her as their new leader. But in spite of their hostility, she had in general been able to get through to the inmates with her intentions of changing things for the better.

Kathryn always had personal projects. She vaguely remembered once having worked with a man, Tom who was convicted of treason. Later she had tried to reform an especially difficult and angry woman called Torres. But it was all a strangely fuzzy memory, like it was something that had happened decades ago in some distant past, which she could not pin point.

She shook her head and returned her focus to the present. Her latest project was reforming one of the lifers. She was an unusually tough case, but Kathryn was not about to give up on her. She had seen that the woman had hidden depths. She was compassionate, fiercely protective and undoubtedly intelligent, but she had an image of a troublemaker. She shown an enormous amount of obstinacy rage; protesting against the rules. She was contraire and had challenged every decision Kathryn had made. This Nikki Wade reminded Kathryn of someone she could not recall, but it was someone who seemed to have played a special part in her life at some point.

She had been forced to admit to herself that Nikki had stirred something else inside her. Something she was definitely not ready to acknowledge or even act upon. They had started out rather at odds. It had been an open confrontation in front of the whole prison, inmates and guards watching their interaction with interest and curiosity. They had argued about a fashion show, resulting in Kathryn cancelling it. Afterwards she had found out that Jim Fenner had placed Nikki on the block, punishing her for picking a fight with the wing governor. She had gone down to the block, only to find Nikki stripped of clothes and in an extremely temperamental mood. Somehow she had managed to get through to her and they had made an agreement. The prisoners could have their fashion show back and Nikki would keep an eye on them and ensure that they would behave. It had been the start of a rocky, and somewhat fragile friendship.

But although fragile in the beginning their friendship had grown stronger with every passing week and they had come to an acceptance with mutual respect, where they helped and supported each other, when no one else was watching. They could still come to blows and disagree about the rules, but in general they did understand the other person’s limitations and passions.

Kathryn had introduced Nikki to the work of Leonardo da Vinci and had even smuggled some books about his work into her. Whenever there was a few free moments they had some philosophic discussions where Kathryn would help Nikki find her way back to the warm and loving person she truly was, and who Kathryn could clearly see behind that hard nut facade. The question was just if she would be able to penetrate the shell and reach the soft core completely and guide her through the hardship of her quest back to humanity.

Kathryn Janeway was not someone who normally overslept, since her sense of duty and precision was immense. But this morning had been different. She had woken totally disoriented, bathed in cold sweat and at a total loss. And to make it even worse, she was so late, that she did not even have time for her precious cup of coffee. A vice she acknowledged, but never the less needed for starting her day properly.

She had had some strange dreams during the night. Dreams that had disturbed her profoundly and made her question herself beyond reason. Dreams that had shaken her and made her question everything that she, up until that point had believed was her reality. She had been out amongst the stars on some kind of vessel and people had worn strange uniforms. It had seemed more real to her than her present life, though it was all she could recall ever having done. However, the lingering feeling of being in the wrong place at the wrong time did not leave her and it unsettled her beyond belief. There was definitely something odd, but she could not pinpoint what it was. That grated her nerves and she felt totally out of sorts.

She was of Irish decent, but born in Bloomingdale, Indiana. Her parents had moved back to Ireland when she and her sister were just kids. Her first fiancé Justin had died in a car-crash that had also killed her father. She had been in the car as well, but was hurled out before it landed in a lake. There was nothing she could do to save the two people she loved and the guilt had never left her. Years after she had started a relationship with her old childhood friend Mark Johnson. They were engaged and about to marry, but then she had moved to London to take over a job as wing governor at HMP Larkhall women’s prison. He had not been pleased, but there was nothing she could do about that.

Normally Kathryn would never think back on her life, but live it fully in the present. However the dreams had made her restless. They also had made her reconsider, what was truly her reality. For the first time in years she felt totally misplaced, but could not pinpoint why. She just somehow knew that something was awfully wrong. It was like she was not supposed to be where she was.

At the moment she was in her car, a little red Peugeot driving at an unsafe velocity. While waiting at a road block she took her time applying some mascara, but was interrupted by impatient blows in the horns from the cars behind her. She cursed silently and drove on. She arrived at Larkhall, where the guard stopped her. He had a puzzled look on his face, so she rolled down the window and stuck her head out.

“Do you need some identification, or something?” she asked.

He looked more intensely at her and then lit up in a smile.

“No, sorry Mam.. It’s ok… Just drive right on…” He waved her inside, and she quickly put the car in gear and drove on, reaching her designated parking space. She turned off the motor and took a look at her face in the mirror. She started to laugh, the absurdity of the whole situation not eluding her keen sense of humour. Her eyes sparkled when she started to reapply her mascara.

My God, I look like a racoon… No wonder Dave was starring at me like that, she thought with amusement.

Well, the day could only go on to become better. At least that was her hope as she stepped out of the car and into the prison of Larkhall.

Part 1 In the darkness - Chapter 4

The way to humanity is not a question about how you were born or what you are made of, but a question about how you live your life, how you act and how you feel. Humanity will be judged by the actions and not by intentions or how one is born. One unique individual, the result of advanced technology and intelligent human flesh, summarizes and defines humanity in a totally different and new way.


Cargo bay 2 and Bridge of USS Voyager, the Delta Quadrant

She was alone. She was standing on the top of a mountain her feet buried in soft, cold, white wetness called snow. There was no one in sight. She was alone. The world spun, she felt dizzy.

She was in a Borg cube. The harsh grey green light flickering in obscene patterns, smoke or steam made it difficult to see anything other than contours of the drones walking around; efficiently working on whatever task the Borg Queen would order. She was alone. She was… scared. The dark shadows hid the horrors of the Cube. She was led to a round chamber by two drones. She recognized it as the chamber of the Borg Queen. She was wondering what purpose it served for her to be there. She felt a presence behind her and turned around. The Borg Queen approached her with a strange gleam in her dead, cold eyes. She felt her respiration increase. The Borg Queen reached out towards her with her left hand. She noticed a movement behind the Queen. She looked into a pair of blue-grey eyes. The expression she saw overwhelmed her with emotions. The world spun, she felt dizzy.

She was standing on a beach. She was alone. The sun warmed her, but she had never seen the sun. This was not real. She felt someone embrace her from behind, but she could not turn around to see who it was. But instinctively she already knew. She felt the faint whiff of the familiar perfume. She felt the soft curves pressing into her back. She felt herself being held. She was not alone. The world spun, she felt dizzy.

Smoke filled her lungs. The dimmed red lights of the bridge revealed only chaos. The jolts were violent every time the ship was hid by the alien weapons. The captain was sitting in the command chair with a stubborn streak to her chin. The crew was liberally strewn around like rag dolls with each blast. The captain had blood running from her temple, but did not seem to notice. Seven tried to reach out to her captain, but she was hauled away. She was alone. She was… horrified...



“Regeneration cycle incomplete,” the computer voice clipped.

Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix 01, human designation Annika Hansen, former Borg drone opened her eyes abruptly and stepped down from the dias of the Borg alcove that glowered with green lights; green like the eyes of the captain. The Captain, who had severed her from the Borg Collective two years ago, a proud and resilient human female by the name of Helen Stewart. Seven frowned as she recalled her dream. The captain had not been in that dream. It had been another human female, but still clad in a uniform adorned with red shoulders signalling command and the four golden pips of a captain. She had looked vaguely familiar with her auburn hair and blue-grey eyes, but Seven was unable to place her with certainty, and it disturbed her.

She had been dreaming. Something that was rather unusual for the former Borg drone, since the Borg did not dream. It is irrelevant and inefficient, but for her human part it was a concept that she had become familiar with. However, the dreams she had had recently were haunting her, even when being awake and it had not been a very pleasant experience. It had disturbed her normally cool and composed self. It had diverted her focus from her work at Astrometrics to a darker side of her human nature that she did not want to acknowledge. She felt at a loss and as the insecurity swept through her systems she felt compelled to admit her need for guidance in handling all these new inputs. Seven found that only one person on the whole ship would be able to provide her with the necessary understanding and help in her effort to pursue the knowledge of her dreams; the captain. Only with that very special individual could she reveal her inner thoughts and fears, only with that woman did she find peace and true friendship, in spite of their many arguments and battle of wills. However strange it seemed, it only served to strengthen their bond and make them come closer.

Seven’s cortical implant made her memory work like a databank of files, she could recall at any moment whenever she needed the information stored there. She thought back on the many times where her captain had taken time to explain the difficult concept of humanity and implications of human behaviour. The captain had always allowed her to explore her individuality; in fact she had started the process by serving her link to the collective and repeatedly encouraged her to take the first difficult steps towards her lost humanity.

A picture suddenly broke from the normally well structured thoughts, the face of the auburn haired woman from her dreams, but it was more than just a dream. As fast as it had rushed through her consciousness it disappeared leaving Seven slightly confused and disoriented. For a brief moment she swayed, but got a tight grip on her working console, where she steadied herself. She then tapped in some commands and started to review the calculations she had set the computer to make during the night. While surveying the results of her calculations another part of her mind worked on analysing her dreams. However, the conscious part of her brain studied the results carefully.

If the algorithms proved to be correct the calculation would show that a possible recalibration of the sensor array used by Astrometrics would improve the efficiency with almost 1.307 % and the captain would be pleased… with her… and with her work. In fact there was nothing more Seven wanted than to please the captain and to make her approve of her efforts. Yet just as often Seven was able to aggravate the captain beyond normal means. Why did she always do that? She had no clear answer to that. She only knew that it did matter to her how the captain would perceive her performances, though she pretended that it was not the case.

Disturbing her just as much as her reoccurring dreams, was the sudden increased amount of emotions that kept flooding her systems. They were overwhelming her in a very unsettling manner and were not at all as appealing as she was normally led to believe that human emotions were. She quickly tapped some new commands into her console and her face got a pleased expression when the results of her enquiry were listed on the screen. She straightened her stance, downloaded the information to a pad and strode purposefully out of cargo bay 2 leaving behind her strange dreams and human emotions. Seven was the efficient worker, dedicated to her work and with a talent for advanced science.

Seven walked onto the bridge with a determined look on her face, totally oblivious to the long glances bestowed upon her by Harry Kim, the young ensign ad Ops. A longing look not unlike what she received from the majority of the male crew on Voyager as well as some of the females. On lots of previous occasions had Seven noticed the looks and knew that she, by human standards, was to be considered beautiful, but beauty was irrelevant, she was Borg and though most of her former implants had been removed, there was still several left to remind everyone, including herself, of her 18 years in the Borg collective. Beside from the lingering looks she had also noticed another set of looks. Looks that told a story of fear, disdain, disgust and even hatred. Contrary to what the crew generally believed, she was very aware of those looks and conscious of the reasons. Though she normally seemed cold, unapproachable, aloof and sometimes arrogant on the outside and thus named the Ice Queen by the crew, it was all just a façade she used to keep people at an arms length. Why that was essential to her only vaguely registered in her mind.

She knew why the crew hated and feared her. It was because she was Borg, and since most of the crew had had bad experiences with the Borg and many had lost loved ones at Wolf 359 she had come to represent all those negative things. The disgust and disdain came from the same emotions as the fear, but manifested itself due to her aloofness. The crew thought she believed herself to be superior to them. She was superior both physically and mentally, but there were times when she would give it all up for just one kind word and loving look from the captain.

She stopped by the science station and downloaded some more information on another pad. Then she stood and walked over to the captain’s ready room without even acknowledging the rest of the bridge crew of the alpha shift. She was on a mission. A mission to speak with the captain, and hopefully she would achieve some kind of guidance regarding her dreams and emotions. Seven pressed the chime and waited for the inevitable:

“Come” Spoken in a smooth Scottish accent that just might be able to melt even the heart of an Ice Queen, though it did lack something in Seven’s opinion. She just could not remember what it was. Seven literally shook her head to rid herself of the disturbing thoughts before entering the ready room.


End of Part 1

I apologize for any errors (spelling and grammar) as this part is only half way beta-read....

I am looking for beta-readers, so if any one is interesting please send me a PM or a mail... :)


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Part 2 Diversions - Chapter 1

When contrasts meet sparks can fly, or the fire can be totally extinguished. The outcome depends solely on the elements involved; their properties, their characteristics and their ability to interact, or maybe even their lack of compatibility. This is no different than what is to be expected, when two bolts of fire clash. However, one must be prepared and ready to take action, when it is needed.


HMP Larkhall Women's Prison, London

Nikki was struggling with some resilient weed in the prison garden. She had come to value the work as it brought her some precious hours of fresh air and the illusion of being free. However, at the moment it did not bring her any consolation as her mind was on something quite different than plants and soil. She sighed deeply and threw the trowel across the flower bed hitting the bucket. She had had another argument with the wing governor, or Kathryn, she reminded herself. The woman was as stubborn as a donkey and was acting so by the book that it was sickening. Nikki knew Kathryn Janeway had to keep a certain protocol and stick to the rules of the prison system, but Nikki inwardly cursed the woman for being so damned uptight with her personal life. Nor did it help that Nikki had fallen in love with the wing governor and thus fought to convince her to see the truth.

Normally Nikki was not into older women, but this particular woman had touched something inside her very core and made her realize that not all the people within the prison system were bigoted, ignorant fools. Besides Kathryn was not that much older than Nikki, only about 8 or 10 years, and she had to admit to herself that the woman did look awfully hot in those business suits, showing off nice legs and curves in the right places, even if they were not excessively voluptuous. But that was not all that made her so special, it was her personality. She was strong willed, compassionate, warm, and she really seemed to care for the women inside the prison. She also radiated strength and energy whenever entering a room. Nikki could not help but daydream about the petite auburn haired woman with those sparkling blue-grey eyes, and her hands that gestured so passionately when she was trying to explain something.

I wonder what the touch of those hands would be like,' she mused 'I'll bet those long slender fingers could do magical things.

However, that was not the foremost thing on Nikki's mind at the moment. She was contemplating their last exchange of heated words. The argument between them this time had been more vigorous than before. They had often enough clashed in verbal battles, both being extremely head-strong. Not to mention the fact that Nikki had challenged Kathryn from her first day as wing governor, and for a long time they had butted heads, even as they eventually began to trust each other little by little and tentatively started to build some kind of friendship in mutual respect for each other as real persons, and not just like jailer and inmate. Nikki had realized that Kathryn's concern for the prisoner's well-fare was genuine and not just a propaganda trick to boost her own career, even though that did seem to be her main goal in life.

Even as the normally pleasant thoughts of the wing governor flooded Nikki's mind she had the nagging feeling that something was very wrong; something beyond the fact that they were on the opposite side of the bars. She struggled to clear her mind and focus on the reasons for her sudden doubts.


* * * * *

Nikki had been summoned to the wing governor's office once again. She knew she was in trouble, but did not really think it was all her fault. She had been provoked by Shell Dockley, who had been getting on her nerves all day, and finally her blasted temper had gotten the better of her. She had lashed out and jumped over the canteen desk in order to beat her up, but Nikki had been stopped by several prison guards. And maybe that had been for the best, because she was not certain she could have stopped herself from killing Shell Dockely. But Nikki did regret that her actions had put her on the wrong side of Kathryn Janeway, and she did not look forward to the lecture she knew she was about to receive.

Kathryn Janeway did not look up from the papers on her desk as Nikki was brought into her office. Nikki hesitated and kept standing at the same spot as the guard had left her.

"Nikki, sit down…" Kathryn Janeway spoke in a low, icy voice while giving the dark haired woman a stern glare from steel grey eyes sparkling with restraint anger.

Nikki frowned, but reluctantly did as she was told. The look she got did not give any leeway for objections and she instinctively knew that it was not the time to challenge the wing governor. The air was chilled below zero degrees and the silence was almost suffocating. She had a very bad feeling about the whole situation, but could not do anything about it other than just wait until the wing governor was ready to speak to her. When she finally did it was in a calm, steely voice that could etch off the paint from the walls.

"I've been bending every damn regulation and rule for you… I've been more than lenient towards you… So why do you keep getting into trouble?"

There was no answer coming from Nikki. She just looked intently at Kathryn, who stared back at her with slight exasperation shading her grey eyes. A sudden image of a woman with dark blonde hair and green-grey eyes invaded Nikki's memory and made her loose focus for a brief moment. She was pulled back when the wing governor spoke again, this time in a softer tone:

"I care about you Nikki, but I can't keep closing my eyes whenever you choose to take matters in to your own hands and I can't ignore how you keep disobey orders."

The wing governor had left the chair and walked around the desk. She started to pace the floor seeming preoccupied. Kathryn finally stopped in front of the chair where Nikki was seated and looked at her with something resembling affection.

"You are valued mem…" she stopped mid-sentence as suddenly vivid images from her recent dreams rushed through her mind and made her dizzy with their intensity. It was images of strange creatures, alien humanoid life forms, colourful nebulas and a tall blonde woman with cybernetic implants scattered all over her body. All colour vanished from Kathryn's face and she swayed, making Nikki rush out of the chair and reach out for her, catching her as she fell. The last thing she saw was the floor rushing against her before everything went pitch black.

"What happened?" she croaked when she slowly came around, looking up into concerned dark eyes. She tried to pull herself to a sitting position, but immediately regretted to have made the attempt as dizziness swept over her making her nauseous.

"You fainted… Are you alright? Should I call your secretary?" Nikki was worried by Kathryn's sudden frailness. She always appeared to be so strong, emanating an aura of steely determination. Seeing her so vulnerable like this was disturbing. She felt a little out her wits of the swift change in her normally composed demeanour.

"No!" Kathryn retorted a little more harsh than intended. "No, just give me a moment please… I'll be alright," she said trying to smooth out the tension in her voice. She tried to stand up without much success, until Nikki extended her hand and pulled her up.

"Are you sure?" she said with concern as she led Kathryn back to the chair behind the big desk.

"Yes… I'll be fine..." Kathryn hesitated. "Thank you Nikki… for helping me."

"You're welcome, Kathryn," Nikki said quietly before she walked out of the office and back to the wing escorted by the waiting prison guard.


TBC