Disclaimers: I do not own Inuyasha or any of the characters on that show; they belong to Rumiko Takahashi.

A/N: so this is more of a satire fic to typical Inuyasha Mary Sues. Enjoy this one shot. Oh and this one is poorly written on purpose for the satire humor. That and it’s supposed to be fast paced, like most typical Sue fan fictions are.

Sue Who Are You?

So, Inuyasha and gang were standing around at some destroyed village. “So this was a work of a demon’s?” Miroku asked. The villagers nodded. “Then let’s go find the sick son of a *****!” Miroku added while all five friends began to walk away from where they were. It was then, suddenly a girl showed up in front of the gang. She wore a white kimono that was so short you could almost see part of her panties. Her hair was raven black, it was shiny and it reached down to her knees and was tied in a high ponytail. Her eyes were golden colored and she wore sandals. Her beautiful golden eyes caught the charm of Miroku.

“Hi my name is Chouchou Sakura. I am the daughter of Inuyasha and Bankotsu. I am also married to Sesshomaru, AKA fluffy, so back off Kagome. I am like the hottest of the hottest and I’m in your gang. My parents abandoned me when I was just a baby so woe me; but I am still optimistic about life. Kouga raped me when I was just twelve years old and I am part royalty. I was the eight member of the Shichinintai ten years ago when I was fifteen years old and married Sesshomaru afterwards…” Chouchou went on and on about her background as a character.

Kagome was a little annoyed at the second sentence of the introduction. “Daughter of you and Bankotsu; Inuyasha please explain to me on how that is possible. Aren’t the both of you boys?” Kagome asked out of pure shock.

“Well you see Kagome, there is a missing scene from both the Anime and Manga were Bankotsu and I kind of got bored of fighting and decided to talk instead. So we ended up talking about our sex lives for some reason and I wanted to see how good exactly Bankotsu was with yaoi. Then we kind of engaged into sexual intercourse, which mysteriously got me pregnant and I ended up with that Sue. He offered parental support but I had already sent her to the orphanage.” Inuyasha had said with a frown on his face.

Everybody looked at Inuyasha in an odd matter. “I’ve read fan fictions that made more sense then that.” Shippo remarked while he looked to Chouchou and to Inuyasha.

“Yeah, I don’t know what happened except for the fact that I was female and PMsing at the same time.” Inuyasha had said while he crossed his arms and looked to Chouchou. Chouchou then took out her sword and slashed at Kagome.

Kagome had tried her best to block off the attacks but then she had fallen to the ground; bleeding to death. Her horrendous death had caused Inuyasha and gang to burst out crying. They then glared to Chouchou and began to attack her. Quickly, Chouchou blocked it off and turned into a giant dog demon.

The fight went on for hours and hours on and on. Inuyasha kept using the same attacks over and over but… oh my god they didn’t work. Chouchou bit into Inuyasha’s sword snapped it in half. “Is this how you’re supposed to respect your mother?” Inuyasha shouted while he kicked the dog down making Chouchou turn back into human form.

“Apologize right now.” Inuyasha shouted, “or I’ll your father here.” It was then Chouchou refused to apologize which caused Inuyasha to walk off. About an hour later Inuyasha came back while dragging Bankotsu towards Chouchou.

“Inuyasha, I’m not gonna touch any Mary Sue that was born from you. Besides, it seems like only now you need my help after sending the brat to the orphanage.” Bankotsu shouted. He struggled to get out of the grasp of Inuyasha but only then did he look at Chouchou. “That’s no daughter of mine.” Bankotsu said with a frown.

“Hello papa. I’m sure that you know me very well. My name Chouchou…” just before she could greet herself, she was hit in the head by Sango’s boomerang. “Owwie, that hurts!” the Mary Sue said while she rubbed her head and groaned in pain.

Just before she was to greet herself; Sesshomaru showed up with hearts in his eyes for Chouchou. “FLUFFY-KINS I’M RIGHT HERE!” Chouchou yelled while she jumped into the ever so caring arm of Sesshomaru and embraced him lovingly.

“Oh Chouchou my darling, my only love; you have managed to melt my cold heart and respect humans more. I have ne’er seen such beauty- okay who threw that at me?” Sesshomaru shouted while he looked behind and saw that Bankotsu had thrown a rock at the demon lord.

“Quit ripping off Shakespeare, Romeo.” Bankotsu yelled while he picked up a book titled ‘Romeo and Juliet’ and then read out some of Romeo’s lines out loud. “Girls don’t like men who can’t come up with their own romantic lines.” Bankotsu then added after reading out the lines; which only took him an hour to do so.

“Oh my god, Bankotsu you know the lines from that play?” Inuyasha asked while he approached Bankotsu in awe. The mercenary nodded but only to receive a kiss from the half dog demon.

That was when Bankotsu pushed Inuyasha away. “No Inuyasha, we’re not gonna have anymore babies.” Bankotsu said but then Chouchou broke the two up.

Finally, a group of rabid Sesshomaru Fan-girls showed up and attacked Chouchou for Sesshomaru. Chouchou died of aids. Bankotsu and Inuyasha actually got married. Kagome came back to life and married Hojo. Sesshomaru married someone actually worth his time. Shippo married Kirara. Sango decided to marry Miroku and they got star roles in Romeo and Juliet.

In short, everyone lived happily ever after. The end.

THAT WAS THE GREATEST THING I'VE EVER READ. I LOVED IT. I WANT TO MAKE SOMETHING LIKE THAT FOR BLEACH...

INFACT, I WILL. CAN I SAKU?

As I said on MSN: You're allowed to. :3

I ASKED HERE FIRST, THEN I IMED YOU.

:clapping: That was freckin hilarious!!!

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD this is the greatest satire involving a mary sue I have ever read XD

Omg that was funny! :narutolol:

xDDDDDDD

HAHAA OMG I LOVED IT!
Your a genius, pure genius..
xDDD

ROFL!

GENIUS. PURE GENIUS!

-Starts the slow clapping motion-

*continues in slow clapping with Aiko*

OMG I was laughing so hard, I thought my gut was going to burst. XDDDD Man, that is great **** right there.....great ****....

Best thing I think I've read on here....XDD

Man, that was just perfect. IT's true, all these stupid rabid fangirls try to make you sympathize for their character, and go from there, just butting their way into the InuYasha anime and killing Naraku by themselves in the end, end up with Sesshomaru, Or InuYasha, or some already taken guy in the series (Yeah, back off Sessh is Hikari's!! XDD)

Jeez...you should write more of these....XDD

~Kari

OMG that was funny!! I liked it very much!! ^___^ Great job!

I'm gonna write another of these satires. x3

It's gonna be a BankotsuxSango one.

XDD Awesome.