Hello to all:
These last two days have been bad. I have been teary, depressed & anxious. I won't and don't want to go to the ER. I am not suicidal. Today I have taken Vistaril, then finally Trazodone 50mg trying to feel better. This was in the evening. I think I finally feel better. I know these drugs well. I will call my shrink on Monday. She was not available today, as the office was closed along with the holiday after Thanksgiving. And I am not going to the ER just to ask what drug to take to feel a little better. I was not feeling depressed until 1600 and on. Someone please put me to sleep, so I won't feel depressed :So Sad: It's like I can't stand it when I start feeling like that. I will do anything to not feel so horrible. I take Seroquel & Topomax in the evening as well. And my shrink said I could bump up my Seroquel, which I already did yesterday. I will take the same dose as I did yesterday. I also have Xanax, but that is like a drop in the bucket when I feel so bad, so why even bother taking that?! It's like a waste of time! I go to Dr. Sullivan (another shrink) next week to get my VNS turned up next Tuesday, Lord, I hope it will help some. I will call my medicine shrink next Monday, and tell her what happened this week. Someone should have been on call, dammit! :Censored: Oh, and I am taking 300mg of Wellbutrin the generic one, when I get up. Yeah, this is treatment stubborn for sure. I shudder to think how I would feel on no medicine at all. I would be suicidal for sure, or dead. The medicine I am on, is hardly keeping the depression at bay, hardly! : streacher : Please folks, pray for me. I need all the help I can get now. :(:
Sincerely,
Bonnie

Bonnie, Your depression will go away just give the VNS and the medicine some time (I know that's hard to hear right now). I am on two of the medicines that your are on (Seroquel and Wellbutrin). They are both excellent drugs.
As for your VNS, your doctor will find the right setting that works for you. Just hang in there, you'll be fine.
For now just try to get your mind off of your problem. You will be feeling better soon, trust me. :)

Hang in there Bonnie.

This will pass. I think the stressors of the hoilday seasons just get to everyone. I was bawling my eyes out yesterday before everyone showed up, but it passed when I get distracted and busy with everyone.

If you feel like harming yourself promise me you'll go to the ER! They will help you to a safe place.

Bonnie, take a deep breath, pile the covers on the bed, put or find a good uplifting movie to watch, and pile in bed and don't feel quilty about it.

I'm doing great depression wise, but Thanksgiving took alot out of me. The old me would be at the after Thanksgiving's day sales. This year I have been in my P.J.'s all day, mostly in bed, watching the T.V. I couldn't get interested in a book. My husband has learned that I tire easily and he doesn't mind and I don't feel quity either.

Take care of yourself and the VNS will eventually kick in.

To all of you who wrote back, I thank you. Just reading what you wrote made me feel better. I will go into the ER if I feel like harming myself. My hubby will drag me in for sure. He will give me no options if he knows I'm feeling worse. Even if I don't tell him, he always seems to know. We have been married for 26 years now. I had a rough night, and didn't get to sleep until after 3:30AM. I finally just took something for sleep. I should of just taken something at bedtime for sleep, instead of waiting. Tonight, I will just take something for sleep earlier. I feel hung over today, and I didn't drink any booze. And we don't have any here in the house usually. I'm feeling very tired, but coffee :coffee: is helping. Again, thank you all very much for writing me.
Sincerely,
Bonnie :unsure:

:bigarmhug:

:bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug:

Bonnie, Check with your doctor about the other useful effects that Seroquel has. At a certain dosage it will enable you to sleep. Again, talk to your doctor before adjusting your medication.

Hope you feel better in the next few days! :rolleyes:

I thank all of you for the hugs. I did increase my Seroquel up to 400mg; my doc. said I could do this for sleep. I feel better today. I did fax her a letter telling her about these last two days. Part of me hates the fact I feel better on more of the Seroquel! :wacko: Seroquel is also a mood stabilizer, I do think its a good drug. The maximum dose is 750mg/day. Some patients are on a higher dose. It is good for other mental/mood disorders; besides being an anti-psychotic. I just hate taking pills :Really Mad: but there isn't anything else I can do for now. My disease would like me dead. Anyway, thank you all again for your support.
Sincerely,
Bonnie :Thanx:

Hi Bonnie, Seroquel is an excellent drug. It calms down all the turmoil in your mind. I'm glad that you are feeling better.

Hi Bonnie. Sorry your not feeling top notch right now. I hope you feel better soon.

: sun :

I have to take Geodon as a mood stabilizer.I started taking the Geodon after psychological testing; I started doing better. Of course my VNS settings were alot higher. I've had so many ECT's that it caused me to take a mood stabilizer. I feel alot better taking it and I'm not so arguementive.

Geodon didn't work for me without the VNS. Maybe after you have had the VNS a while, your doseage can come down.

Hang in there, your journey is just beginning. Like I said, it's two steps forward, one step back. :bigarmhug: