not related to my life directly.
I first made this in my dream.
There was always this person, whom I kept on looking.
We were classmates, and I know it was hard to hide my feelings whenever I see my prospect, specially when he's nearby.
One time, I bumped to him on my way home. He said, "Why are you always looking at me?" I didn't answer. He continued, "From now on, I don't want you looking at me, or even talking at me. It doesn't feel right." And he continued walking.
I stopped dead on my tracks. I looked at my hands, which contained 3 droplets of water...
... and it was a sunny, sunny day.
The day after that, I was absent. Till that day, I wasn't able to attend all of my classes. My classmates and teachers were worried about me.
...because I didn't attend my classes on my own accord.
...because I closed my eyes forcefully...
...because I closed my mouth forcefully...
...by stiching them shut.
He visited me one day, and asked me, "Why did you do this to yourself?"
I answered:
"What is the use of my eyes if I am not able to see you?
What is the use of my mouth is I am not able to talk to you?
I can't do anything that'll be of your discomfort
Because I really love you, deeply and true."
Before I knew it, he left. And so, I said to myself:
"What purpose is there in my life if I am not able to spend it with you?"
And there was complete darkness. I don't know if I should fly away.
Whenever I see you, you go away
You don't want to see me, you push me away
You don't even pay attention to me
It's so unfair.
Why do you have to be like this?
Just because I gave you my heart?
Was it really a sin,
to love someone like you?
IF given the chance
I would be your right hand
SO that I may be of use to you
So that you'll see that someone like me
would do anything for you
if you don't want me to see, I'll close my eyes
If you don't want me to speak, I'll close my lips
If you don't want me to follow you, I'll stop
By removing them all
What's the use of them all if I can't use what they're for?
I love you so much
I can't bare not to see you, speak to you, and to follow you.
Because I love you, deeply and true.
-Sacrifice... sai hikawa.