GO OUT AND DRINK MY CHILDREN!

Hear ye, hear ye, children of Abraham; sons of Mordecai; daughters of Esther! On this day, the 13th of Adar, the Jews were saved from Haman, and were given permission to kill their enemies and shit. This day is known as Purim, or lots, after the lots drawn by haman to decide the day when the jews of shusan would be slain.

Now, in the megillah, it is said: Mechayav inish livesumei! - There is an obligation to drink!

[Rambling on why, skip if you only want fun stuff]
The elaborated commandment is that jews should be unable to distinguish mordecai - good guy - from haman - bad guy. My theory, which I've been unable to have my rabbi confirm (because I quit jew school and I think it'd be awkward to talk to him now) is that this is a reference to the garden of good and evil, and how we did not know right from wrong.
[/rambling]

On purim, the jewish god says "let there be drunken fools aplenty". Now, it is up to you, and perhaps a responsible or irresponsible (preferred) guardian, to decide, "will there be drunken fools aplenty?"

(IIRC tomorrow is actually purim day, but you read the story and stuff today and most jew kids have their purim carnivals on sunday)

(Note that I don't command you to drink in moderation for the rest of the year, though in judaism today is technically the only day you should get drunk. See, reform judaism is very accommodating to your alcoholism.)

Oh. We need to drink to get saved from the gates of hell?

I think I'll pass. If God decides to not listen to me in christianity, then he probably won't do it as a jew either.

Nah. It's a "commandment" and something we're supposed to do, but I don't think Jews actually need to follow every commandment to get to heaven. Some are impossible to follow anyway, as they relate to parts of the world (particularly the second temple) which have been destroyed and such.

I'm a Jew now, seriously, I am :)